Saturday, September 09, 2006

Dear Dr. Rob...

Here's the letter I wrote to Dr. Rob, a psychic trying to extort money from me through the mail in exchange for good luck and a stupid lucky pendant.

Dear Dr. Rob,

I appreciate your sincere and personal letter. You make very interesting points regarding the days of fortune that lie ahead for me. It’s nice to know that there is someone out there who genuinely cares for me and is looking out for my well being. Usually people just want my money.

However, I have to question you ability to predict these great events since you could not successfully predict that I would turn down your offer. As a psychic, you should have been able to tell that I am not a loose money launderer and that I would simply throw your letter in the trash with the rest of the euro-garbage I receive.

On the other hand, I am somewhat curious about my days of good fortune and would like to give it a chance. To prove the existence of this good fortune, maybe you can get the ball rolling. Please send me 100 American dollars and a box of wine and I will invest in your mullet of power.

If this does not work for you, perhaps I could be persuaded to enrol if you made apples taste like muffins for a few days or make dogs talk or something.

Regards,
Alex (I won’t write my last name because you already know what it is)


I never heard back from dear ol' Bobby

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